The Curse of The Golden Handcuffs

The golden handcuffs. For those of you who might not know – golden handcuffs are what we use to describe an incentive offered by an employer to an employee to entice them to stay. In most cases it’s a relatively high salary but there is also the annual bonus, stock options, retirement fund contributions and health insurance.

When you first accept the position everything is great. You’re excited, anxious to get started and you’re full of enthusiasm. Slowly over time that enthusiasm wanes. Maybe the job description that was presented to you in the interview isn’t exactly the same as what you’re facing everyday. You’re unhappy, demoralized and maybe even a bit angry. Angry at your boss for misleading you. Angry at yourself for being suckered in.

So why don’t you leave? Why don’t you look for a new job someplace where you know you’ll be happier?

It’s those golden handcuffs.

When you earn a high salary your expenses seem to expand to meet it. There is a certain lifestyle that goes along with certain salaries. If you are accustomed to buying the best clothes, living in a large home, and having to decide which SUV to drive today it’s tough to imagine surviving with anything less. If you spoke to people who had less they would feel the same. They couldn’t imagine living with anything less than what they have right now. Yet there are people who do and they are likely just as happy.

Realize that those little handcuffs are self imposed

When you choose to buy expensive clothes, large homes, fancy cars latest and greatest phones, computers or other gadgets you are solidifying your dependency on that high salary. When you get to the point where you are so unhappy in your current position that you want to leave and work elsewhere there is a problem if you aren’t able to command the same salary. In essence you’re trapped in a job you hate.

There are a couple of things that may help

Shift your perspective. No company is perfect. Every place has its fair share of flaws. Some places require a lot of travel, overtime and weekend work. Others enforce a dress code or don’t encourage an autonomous work environment. And every work place has quirky people. Some personalities just aren’t meant to be in the same building at the same time. The odds that you’re going to love and get along famously with everyone in the new office are slim to none. Someone may have a really annoying laugh while someone else may talk way too much for your liking.  Be realistic and be careful not to glamorize the alternative. Keep this in mind [every place has its flaws] when you’re sizing up where you’re at with where you think you might like to be.

Re-evaluate your lifestyle. It’s unlikely that you intentionally sought out the lifestyle that you are currently living. More than likely it happened so gradually that you don’t even realize where you’re at and if you’re living below, up to or beyond your means. If you don’t already have a budget take some time to create one, if for nothing else get a clue as to where you’re money is going each month. Are there any areas you can reduce or eliminate all together? For everything you choose to let go of and do without those handcuffs are loosened ever so slightly.

Where can you reduce or eliminate? Well that all depends on you and what you think you can do without. Here are a few areas you can think about and see if you are willing to make some sacrifices:

• 2 cars – do you need a car at all? Can you walk or rely on public transport? Could you get away with 1 vehicle?
• cell phones – do you need a cell phone? If you do have you looked into cheaper plans? Do you really need voice mail, texting, caller id, etc …?
• large home – do you need a home as large as the one you are in? Can you downsize and move to an area that has considerably lower taxes?
• satellite or cable – do you need 600 channels? Can you reduce the number you receive and pay a lower monthly amount? Can you eliminate TV altogether?
• personal indulgences – do you need the regular spa treatments, manicures, pedicures, facials etc … Can you do home made treatments instead?
• holidays – do you need to jet set around the world? Can you travel local and still have a great time? Maybe a weekend at a hotel in your hometown may be the little pick me up you need.

Do I think happiness is more important that money? Yes I do. Do I think you should run out and quit your job tomorrow just to be happy? No. But with a little planning and lifestyle tweaking you can get yourself into a position pretty quickly that opens up a whole new set of options for you.

The grass isn’t necessarily greener on the other side. But if you are unhappy in your current job but feel trapped by the golden handcuffs see if a shift in perspective or change in lifestyle can loosen their grip. Given enough time and shuffling of priorities you will be able to move on if that is indeed what you want to do.

See also:

Secrets of the Perpetually Unhappy
What To Do When You Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything
How To Live The Life You Want: Follow Your Dreams

Photo courtesy of: Adam Foster | Code For