Show Your Kids You Love Them
If you have taken on the monumental responsibility of having kids then you know what a joy it is to see their happy smiling faces. You also know how incredibly frustrating it can be when they refuse to put on their boots 2 minutes after you should have left the house. Regardless of what side of the coin you are on right now you still love them. You love them unconditionally. You love them no matter what.
But are you showing your kids that you love them?
Here are some easy ways to simply love your kids (or grand kids). If you don’t have kids of your own think of your nieces and nephews.
Show your kids you love them
Spend time with your kids. Nothing means more to a child than your undivided attention. Next time you are playing with them focus on playing with them. Don’t pay attention to the laundry, or preparing dinner, or wiping the counters. Take note of their face, their enthusiasm and energy levels. Kids just love being the centre of your world.
Help your kids. My sons are still very young. When things don’t go their way they’ve been known to freak out, whine or cry once or twice 
. I’ve learned that all I have to do is help them and it turns their entire world around. Lend a helping hand to a child who can’t figure something out. Teach them and encourage them to ask for help when they need it. Try and resist from doing the task for them. Although it may be quicker, your kids will never learn if you are always doing stuff for them.
Let them help you. My eldest son (perhaps like every other kid out there) wants to be a part of EVERYTHING I do. He loves being included and being able to do the things we big kids are doing. I am working hard at eliminating the word no from my responses to him. Instead of continually telling him no, because quite honestly it’s just easier sometimes, I now try and include him in everything I do. Whether it’s loading the dishwasher, sorting the laundry or feeding the dogs my son is now a part of it. I can tell he has a sense of pride in doing something meaningful and he’s so happy just to be included.
Show affection. I realize that this isn’t easy for some people. Those of you who were raised in a less than affectionate household may have a harder time than others. Despite what you may have been told or may feel showing your child affection is not a sign of being “soft” or “not tough”, it’s a sign of being a loving and caring human being. Hug your kids often, shower them with kisses out of the blue and cuddle with them while you watch a movie. The power of touch is truly amazing. Giving your child affection is an easy way to show them you love them. It also shows them you enjoy being near them and that they are important to you.
Let them choose. Let your kids choose what movie to watch, meal to have for dinner, game to play or book to read. My husband and I have been the ones making most of the decisions so far in our kids lives. It’s nice to be able to put some of the decision making onto our kids. It helps to empower them and build their self-esteem and self confidence. It also helps reduce the complaining because hey, they chose it!
Make them a priority. Don’t put off everything I’ve mentioned above so you can do things like watch TV, respond to emails, talk endlessly on the phone or put in extra hours at the office. Yes it’s important to take time for yourself, slow down, and regroup but for the sake of your relationship with your kids consider taking most of your “me time” when they are napping or down for the night. Truth is there are very few things that are truly important and urgent. Show your kids they are important to you by making them a priority.
What I’m finding with my boys is that they are very visually motivated. They absorb what we are doing far faster and more accurately than what we are saying. Showing our kids love, unconditional love, the love we have for them NO. MATTER. WHAT. has allowed us to establish a positive and healthy relationship with them early on. By showing our kids that we love them we are, as a result, a lot more active and generally happier.
What are your thoughts? Do you agree or disagree? What have I missed?
See also:
Get Rich, Stay Rich – Emotional Bank Accounts
Don’t Wait Their Little Lives Away
Photo courtesy of: ~PhotograTree~
9 Responses to “Show Your Kids You Love Them”
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I love this post, Sherri. These are all really great tips! My favorite, and (at least for me) the most effective has been the first one you mentioned: spending time with my daughter.
Real, quality time, actually focusing on her and her alone. When she was younger it was coloring together or playing with toys together, or me reading to her. These days, it’s sitting down with her and really talking to her, but more importantly, listening to what she has to say.
Jay Schryer´s last blog ..Finally, An Answer
Hi there Sherri.
Loved this post. My 19 month old daughter just loves to help me around the house.We make the beds, empty the dishwasher, sweep the floors and sort the laundry, together. Her favorite thing is to turn on the washing machine. And when I look her in the eyes and say ‘Thank-you darling’ she brightly smiles back at me so proud of herself and replies ‘helping helping’. Household chores have been so much fun!!! I believe that your time is the most precious thing you can give a child.
Thanks Sherri for reminding me to focus when playing, appreciate it.
Ann-Marie´s last blog ..Who Am I?
I love this, Sherri! My favorite is “make them a priority”. To be honest, I’ve fallen short on this one a good bit ever since I started blogging… but I’m making some changes, re-focusing on what matters.
Fact is, my son is my #1 priority. This is why I gave up the security of a second income in order to be able to home school him. The time I will have with him is going to FLY by, and I want to BE THERE for it.
Thanks for this beautiful reminder!
Lisis´s last blog ..Inspiration from Ralph Waldo Emerson: A New Day
Great post Sherri! My kids are older (17 and 19), but I still try to make time to spend with them that is there time. We go to movies, go for walks, etc. It is amazing the insights that young people have.
I love all the ideas! I make sure that we have a time to ourselves. Yes with all 4! Even if it’s two minutes! Hugs, kisses and love you’s need to be everyday! Sometimes a few times a day when we have bad days!
Chele´s last blog ..Menu Plan Monday – August 31st
Sherri
I guess we can all improve how we show love to everyone, but kids are especially important!
My favourite way, and often overlooked because we assume they know already, is to tell them. Tell them what I appreciate about them, how I feel when I watch them, how they make my life more wonderful by being in it.
Of course a simple ‘I love you’ from time to time doesn’t hurt either!
Ian | Quantum Learning´s last blog ..Sticks and stones
This post is absolutely right. My parents have spent most of my childhood working and that means that I was raised by a nanny, a series of babysitters, and daycares. The thing that I wanted most in the world was for my mommy to spend time with me. Now I’m older and my father has retired, so I have been able to spend quality time with him. The best times I have with my parents are when we all talk together over a meal or during a walk. There is nothing more valuable than your time to your kid, though it may not feel like it when they beg for the newest, trendiest toy. Go play in the park. Go swimming. Go to the library and point out all the books you used to love. There is no toy that can beat those memories of my childhood.
Thank you for this post. I think you hit this subject spot on. Kids certainly do need to feel like they are valued, loved, and important. I think this is one of the keys to raising well adjusted children.
Any tips about how to ajust my attitude about the hard parts? I am in the midst of trying to find a balance between me and my kids. I have two who are very young still, 3yo & 20mos and they still need everything done for them. I definitely feel the little ones pick up on your mood and how you feel even if it isn’t a verbal expression. Nevertheless, I am having trouble keeping my patience level, and taking time to really focus only on them. I know how I want to live, but I am having trouble living it without feeling guilty that I am not doing other household tasks that need to be done or frustraited that I am not doing anything for only myself. Any advice for a parent wrestling with this? Thanks…