How To Be The Person You Want To Be
The days come and go; each day like the one before. A week passes and you haven’t really done anything, which isn’t too bad except when weeks turn into months and months into years. Before you know it you’re 80 years old and you haven’t done anything you wanted to. You aren’t the person you knew you could be or wanted to be. This article is about finding what’s important in your life so you can spend the time you have living it to the fullest and becoming the person you’re capable of becoming.
Several years ago someone said to me “you should live your life in a way, that when someone reads your eulogy at your funeral it would be a true reflection of the person you wanted to be”. To get to this point there are a few things we need to do. But I think number one on that list is to live a life with purpose.
How can we live our life with purpose?
Awareness. The first step to purposing your life is to become aware of what you really want out of life. Think about what and how you want to contribute to society, to the lives of those around you, your family and your friends. Think about how you want to be remembered and what you would like people to say about you at your funeral. Do you want to be known for being generous and kind, loving and accepting, fun and full of life or charitable and thoughtful? There are many things that you can be remembered for and it’s up to you to choose what those are. From there it’s a daily challenge to align your actions with what you deem your purpose to be. It’s also important to be aware of how you will feel when you are your ideal person. Not only will it let you know when you’ve achieved your goal, it will also motivate you to get going and to stick to it.
Keep it at the forefront. This is really simple, write (or print) out what you want to be remembered for – your purpose. This doesn’t have to be anything formal or elaborate but you do need to write it out. Post this sheet of paper where you will see it often to keep it in the forefront of your mind. Put it on your bedside table, stick it on your bathroom mirror, or post it on the fridge or in your closet. Start the day off by reading it so your purpose is fresh in your mind. Think about what activities you can do during your day to get you closer to achieving your purpose. At the end of the day reread your statements and see how you did. Could you have done something differently? What can you do tomorrow to get even closer? Are you happy with how you conducted yourself today in every aspect? If not, don’t dwell on it instead look at it as an opportunity to learn and grow and then move on.
Take responsibility. You are the only one that can make it happen. If you don’t try no one will do it for you. If you want something you have to go out, get it and make it happen. Be accountable to yourself, don’t blame others. Concentrate on what you want to achieve and the things or people that can help you get there. Don’t be afraid to ask for help – stand on the shoulders of giants.
What I would like to be remembered for.
1. Being a loving and supportive human being (Mother, wife, daughter, sister, aunt, friend)
2. Being kind
3. Accepting people without judgment
4. Truly enjoying life
5. Being a genuinely happy person
6. Helping people become the best they can be
We all know life is short and every moment is fleeting. Don’t let another day go by without at least giving some thought to who you want to be and what you want to be remembered for. The points I’ve outlined above are not difficult or earth shattering but they are important. They get you thinking about what you want out of life, how to get it and to realize that your happiness and life fulfillment is in your hands.
See also:
Gratitude Journal: 30 Days To Happiness
My Family Rules! 5 Rituals To Establish a Close Knit Family
Selfless Acts-Do Something Nice to Restore Faith in Humanity
Grab the Reins and Enjoy Your Life
Photo courtesy of: horizontal.integration
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Monday is Personal Development day at Serene Journey. We will share with you interesting concepts and ideas that we have learned and give you practical tips on how to apply them to your life. If you have any suggestions for this series feel free to drop us an email or leave them in the comments.
17 Responses to “How To Be The Person You Want To Be”
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Hi Sherri,
I think this is so important. It amazes me how concerned we are with micromanaging our time, yet we practically ignore the big picture. Who are we and where are we rushing to?
Thank you for this thoughtful post.
Sherri,
I like this post because it focuses on what is important rather that just what is urgent. It’s so easy to unconsciously live our life.
What you want to be remembered for is very close to what I want to be remembered for.
Roger – A Content Life’s last blog post..30 Days of Mindful Eating – Day 22
Sherri – A thoughtful post!
It is very true that time speeds by…in fact it seems to me that as I get older, the years fly by faster and faster.
I would add courage and persistence to your list of three steps to living a life with purpose. The courage to believe if the life that you want despite what others may say and the persistence to stick to the cha
Ooopps. I hit the wrong key too soon….
To finish what I was saying…and the persistence to stick to the changes that you have made in your life knowing it is leading you to be the person you want to be.
Have a great day everyone! Remember today is the first day of the rest of your life.
Hi Sherri,
When I was 15, I almost died and that made me realize that life was short and that I needed to make the most out of it and have no regrets.
Then when my mom passed away from cancer, it reinforced the concept to me that you never know when this beautiful journey will be over so why not make the best out of it. As much as it was hard to lose my mom so young, it was a great teacher too.
I think if people fully accepted the idea that they are going to die, then they would truly start living! Thank you for a great post about a very important message!
Nadia-Happy Lotus’s last blog post..The Second Step To Happiness
This is a really useful and thoughtful post, Sherri.
“Think about what activities you can do during your day to get you closer to achieving your purpose.”
I think this is really, really important. It’s pretty easy to say that you want to be remembered as a generous person. But what does that mean action-wise? Does it mean volunteering? Donating 10% of your income? Spending an unspecified amount time listening to a friend? All of the above?
I find that having simple action steps help me focus on what I need to do to be the person I want to be.
Thanks for the post!
Laurie | Express Yourself to Success’s last blog post..Thoughts of Happiness
@ Michael – good point. Setting daily to do lists and task lists is micromanaging your time. It’s important to step back, think longer term and be able to see the forest for the trees.
@ Roger – Living your life consciously is so important yet it’s not obvious to a lot of people. Going along for the ride day after day is ok for a while but I personally would rather live my life on purpose.
@ Steve B – Great additions to the list! Sometimes the biggest rewards in life come from taking a very different approach to one that is more mainstream. When you stray from the pack it does require a lot of courage, and I would add confidence, to keep going despite the criticism.
@ Nadia – I think it’s great that you were able to come out of those really difficult times in your life and see them as learning opportunities. Coming to terms with our own mortality is extremely difficult and takes time but you are exactly right, if we thought more about the fact that it can happen at any time, that there is no natrual order of things we may start approaching each day very differently.
@ Laurie – It all comes down to actions speak louder than words, right? You can have all the best intentions in the world but actually doing it requires a greater committment and a lot more work. It does help to give it a bit of thought up front so you have something to fall back on when trying to take steps towards becoming the person you want to be. We likely won’t be remembered for our intentions so we need to get out there and make it happen.
Hi Sherri,
If we are not driving our life to a purpose,then it’s reasonable to say that we are existing than living. And I’d like to mention that me too would like to be remembered for your six reasons
Vikum’s last blog post..Living in the moment
@ Vikum – Welcome! I couldn’t agree more. Although existing is sometimes the path of least resistance, it is often more rewarding and fulfilling if you are an active participant. Most times you can have a lot more fun if you participate as opposed to being a spectator. Thanks for your comment!
Hi Serene, just arrived to your blog from Zen Habits
First I’d like to commend you for the photo choice. It’s just lovely and very fitting to the idea. Or it might be my imagination, but to me it says something like embrace your childhood dream, that one you always wanted to be a hero or heroine of some sort.
The world has tons of couch potatoes already
@ Miguel de Luis – Hi welcome! I love your interpretation of the picture I chose for this post. I love using photographs because they say different things to different people.
I think it is important to embrace whatever dream you have or had and go for it at full speed. One thing that helps Gwynn and I decide on whether to go for something or not is to ask “When we’re 80 years old will we regret doing it or not doing it?” The answer to that question is usually the deciding factor for us. Thanks for your comment.