Letting Go To Enjoy Life

Leo Babauta over at Zen Habits has been an inspiration of mine for a while now. But recently there have been 2 posts that have particularly struck a chord with me, one on dealing with fear and another yesterday, a tribute to his grandpa.

It’s been 7 years since my grandpa died and I have not yet been able to move on. He was a very important person in my life and certainly the patriarch of the family. I don’t quite know why I haven’t come to terms with his death after such a long time. I suppose it’s just as simple as, I still miss him. He died an old man peacefully in his sleep in their family home. I can only hope that anyone live a life similar to his.

I suppose I’m afraid that I’m forgetting him. Forgetting the sound of his voice, the grip in his strong weathered hands and all the stories he told about his 89 years of life. I’m not even sure I know what “letting go” or “coming to terms with” means. All I know is that I want to be able to think about him and talk about him without feeling anxious, incredibly sad or upset.

I’m making an effort this year to take small steps to become OK with the fact that he is no longer here and to rebuild the memories of him that I have shut out now for the past 7 years. I know my grandpa would have celebrated the life of someone who’s died not held onto it and shut it out. So in the spirit of living and in the spirit of my grandpa, I will move on.

My grandpa never uttered the words “I can’t do it” at least not that any of us could remember. He liked to do everything himself or at least give it a shot. From baking and building bird houses to kites and outboard motor repair my grandpa did it all. He’s the only person I know that has taken a branch from a tree and whittled it into a whistle – and it actually worked!

He always had an interesting story to tell anyone who would lend an ear. Most often it was about something funny that happened to him while serving in the Armed Forces, a funny incident during a camping trip with his Scout troop or a place he and my grannie visited on their many trips abroad.

Family was a huge part of my grandpa’s life. He was always happiest when he had his entire family around him. Birthday parties and anniversaries were always a BIG deal to him and everyone knew my grandpa loved a party.

My grandpa lived a long and happy life and he was able to see all of his children and grandchildren grow up. He welcomed new family members (like my husband) with open arms and an open heart. He set such a high standard for the rest of us to live up to in life and in spirit. So to sum up my grandpa in a few words: no regrets, live and enjoy life to its fullest and be happy.